Doing The Time Warp

I've always been open about my love of movies and going to movie theaters. But there's always been one moviegoing experience that I'd never got to partake in, that being attending a midnight screening of The Rocky Horror Picture Show. I love Rocky Horror, and the DVD has proudly been a part of my collection for ten years. But seeing the real Rocky Horror, the one populated by the loons in costumes throwing stuff in the air and pantomiming the movie... that's something something I'd never got to partake in.

That is, until last night.

I finally got the chance to attend one of the midnight screenings of Rocky Horror that the Kentucky Theater up in Lexington hosts every month, and I loved every second of it. I didn't go in any sort of a costume, unfortunately, but I still had an absolute ball tossing stuff, yelling at the screen, and doing the actual Time Warp dance. How can someone not have the time of their life with that?

And I knew going in that it might be kinda crazy, but standing outside the theater before the movie started, I learned that I'd severely underestimated the level of actual crazy that would be had. I mean, you know you're in for a wild experience when a couple of half-naked hoochies with mohawks are getting spanked with Twizzlers in front of the theater before the movie starts. I anticipated seeing something silly, but that? There's no anticipating that.

Having finally got to be a part of the theatrical experience, my appreciation for Rocky Horror has gone up a hundredfold. Why can't every movie be this much fun?

A Busy, Busy Week

You wouldn't believe just how busy the last seven days have been for yours truly. My job has cut my hours something fierce lately, leaving me with lots of free time to do fun stuff, primarily movie watching.

On Monday, I headed out to see Piranha 3D, which was a heck of a lot of fun. Of course, it isn't a "good" movie per se. But it's an utterly shameless parade of blood, naked women, and outright silliness, which makes it way more entertaining than you may expect it to be. Like The Expendables, there's really no critiquing Piranha 3D, because it's more about having an hour and a half of dumb fun than compelling storytelling or award-worthy acting. On the usual scale, the movie gets three and a half stars and a thumbs-up.

I followed that on Friday with another trip to the theater to see The Last Exorcism. I'm not going to go too in depth with it because I'm working on a full review of it for the S@TM blog, but what I will say is that The Last Exorcism was flawed yet frightening, and that it gets four stars on the scale.

Also over the course of the week, I actually managed to write five new movie reviews. Yeah, five in one week. I've surprised even myself. The movies in question are The Toxic Avenger, The Toxic Avenger Part II, The Toxic Avenger Part III: The Last Temptation of Toxie, Citizen Toxie: The Toxic Avenger IV, and [·REC] 2. I know you're thinking, "one of those movies is not like the others, one of those movies just doesn't belong." But hey, after knocking out all four Toxic Avenger movies in four days, I was still on a roll and wanted to review something else. And besides, I'd had [·REC] 2 on my DVR since the beginning of July, so I figured writing a review was a good enough reason for me to finally watch it. So get to clicking the links, won't you?

Oh, and one more thing... there was something else I did recently that I really want to post about. But I think that merits its own post, not being stuck down at the bottom of this one. So hang on a little bit, and I'll give you all the details.

The Manliest Movie Ever Made

You devoted followers of the MSX have probably figured out by now that I love movies, and that I love going to movie theaters. But it's been nearly a month since I've been to one, and that had to change. So today I made the decision to head out and see the new action flick The Expendables. Or as some friends of mine like to call it, "Testosterone: The Motion Picture."

To sum it up in a few words, The Expendables kicks ass. Its mere existence makes me want to stand up and celebrate the action movie genre as a whole, so imagine how I felt actually seeing it. Though only Sylvester Stallone and Jason Statham really get the chance to shine among the sizable ensemble cast, everybody in it is thoroughly awesome. The fight scenes, the car chases, the overly gratuitous action, the flimsy plot; that's all awesome too. The only thing it was missing was the cheesy one-liners that made '80s action movies so cool.

There's not really a whole lot to critique about The Expendables, since it's not the kind of movie where one can do any sort of in-depth analysis. But that's what's so fantastic about it. It's an utterly shallow movie where many bullets are fired, many punches are thrown, and many things explode. And sometimes, that's all I want out of a movie. So if you're looking for a rating on my Sutton Scale, The Expendables gets a very solid four stars out of five. It's the kind of movie that makes me proud to be a man.

Thirty Years At Camp Crystal Lake

I became a fan of the horror genre when I was a kid, around the age of ten or eleven. And thanks to a combination of the neighborhood video store and TV shows like MonsterVision and USA Up All Night at the time, I was introduced to - and am still a fan of - the Friday the 13th franchise.

The reason I bring this up is because 2010 marks the thirtieth anniversary of the original Friday the 13th movie's release. Thirty years ago, Sean Cunningham and Paramount Pictures gave the world Jason Voorhees and turned slasher movies into a juggernaut that would dominate the horror genre for the better part of the '80s. And I can't thank them enough for it.

But of all the horror movie villains and franchises that have been created since the genre first started, why have I been so drawn to Jason and the Friday the 13th saga? To tell you the truth, I don't know. If I did know at some point, I've forgotten. I think a lot of it came from MonsterVision and Up All Night, with the host segments making the movies a ton of fun. (Seriously, I'm still depressed that both of these shows were cancelled so long ago.) And when I started watching the versions of the movies that hadn't been edited for television, I still had a blast watching them.

Admittedly, the Friday the 13th movies aren't good ones from a conventional standpoint. But they're just so dumb and so cheesy that they're a lot of fun. Even the especially crappy ones manage to have at least a little charm, particularly if you enjoy mocking bad movies.

I know that most non-fans probably think these movies are just a load of crap. Practically every diehard Friday the 13th fan knows how much glee Siskel and Ebert took in ripping the movies to shreds. That's almost part of the franchise's "legend," so to speak. But as for yours truly, the twelve movies are required viewing on days like today. So if you'll excuse me, I still need to go watch one.

Oh, and happy Friday the 13th.