Was The Working Title "Four Weeks"?

Hey folks, I saw another movie! Want my review? No? Too bad, you're gonna get it.

I went to Lexington to see a neato British flick called 28 Days Later. The film begins with a group of animal activists attempting to release a pack of monkeys from cages. Their handler presses that they are infected with a highly contagious virus called "the rage," but the activists set one of the monkeys loose anyway. The monkey starts raising some pissed-off monkey hell, and then we cut to black. Twenty-eight days later, a naked guy by the name of Jim awakens in an abandoned London hospital. He puts on some clothes and starts roaming around London, which now resembles more of a ghost town than a bustling European metropolis. Jim ends up at a church filled with dead people, and a priest (and a few other folks) chase him through town. He's saved by some people wielding Molotov cocktails, who explain to Jim that "the rage" has wiped out almost all of England, and has now spread to Paris and New York City. Those that are infected become red-eyed, blood-puking psychopaths just twenty seconds after being exposed. Anyway, Jim and some of his friends eventually end up in the company of some rather shady soldiers, and it isn't long before the "fit hits the shan."

If you go in thinking that it's gonna be filled with balls-to-the-wall gore and zombies, zombies, and nothing but zombies, you're gonna be sadly disappointed. The film concentrates on the main characters more than the plight ailing them. If you're a fan of George Romero's Day of the Dead, you'll totally love the movie once the characters hook up with the soldiers. It seems that the filmmakers drew much inspiration from the second and third installments of George Romero's "Dead" trilogy, as well as a dash of Resident Evil. I do suggest seeing this film if you're a fan of low-budget horror films from foreign countries, or if you're just a fan of the horror genre.

That's my update for the night. I'm gonna go to sleep, dear readers. Sleep well.

Hulk Smash!

So anyway, I saw The Hulk on Saturday night. Wanna know what I thought of it? I think Hollywood may have actually produced a comic book movie worse than Daredevil. Really.

The scene where Bruce first turns into the Hulk is shrouded in darkness. It was kinda tough to see what he was doing aside from the occasional explosion. They probably wanted to shroud him in darkness to build up to his big reveal, but everybody already knows what Hulk looks like, so there's no point to that. But in a later scene, he saves his girlfriend from a pack of dogs with the same powers as Hulk, but it's almost totally black! I couldn't see one stinking thing that happened! Wouldn't the producers want viewers to see a big action scene?

So they had this plotline about Bruce suppressing this really nasty memory from when he was little. Turns out his dad tried to kill him, but when his mom tried to stop him, they fell and she landed on a butcher knife and died. I discovered today that the same thing happened in the comics, but I didn't know that prior to seeing the movie on Saturday. Having said that, I can say that I saw the whole "Mr. Banner killed Mrs. Banner" thing coming from a mile away, just 15 minutes into the movie.

Another thing I didn't get was the ending. What happens is halfway through the flick, Nick Nolte (Bruce's dad) injects himself with some serum and gets the power to absorb the essence of anything he touches. What that means is that he can touch something, and it can basically become part of him. He demonstrates this power by touching a giant piece of machinery, merging with it, then squashing a cop under it. Anyway, the Army captures Bruce and straps him into a giant electric chair so if he hulks up, they'll fry him. They let Nolte in to talk to him, and Nolte loses his temper, grabs the cord the electric chair is hooked up to, and bites it. Doing so turns him into a giant bolt of lighning. Bruce freaks out, hulks up, and Lightning Nolte grabs him. Hulk jumps through the ceiling, and lands about five miles away in a lake. Again, the scene is super dark, so it's hard to really tell what's going on. The confusion lasts around three days before, from what I can gather, that Nolte wanted to take Hulk's powers from him, so instead of fighting, Hulk just says "You want it, you got it!" Nolte makes an attempt, but something happens and Nolte explodes or something. I really don't know, and I don't think the movie did either. It's like the movie just threw up its hands and gave up. If the movie itself doesn't care, why should I?

The only real worthwhile part of the movie itself was the cameos of Stan Lee and Lou Ferrigno. Outside of that and the trailers for Terminator 3 and the new Punisher movie, I cannot in good faith recommend this movie to anyone that isn't a hardcore "Hulkamaniac." Even if you are a big fan of the big green guy, you'll be disappointed. Thumbs in the middle, leaning down.

That's all for now. G'nite.

Will The Next One Be "Dumb And Dumbest"?

Okay, folks. Yesterday was Friday the 13th, and it was a full moon. Odd. Quick useless trivia: Yesterday marked the twenty-third anniversary of the release of the very first Friday The 13th film. Happy belated birthday to everyone's favorite machete-swinging hockey fan.

I also happened to see a movie yesterday, called Dumb And Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd. It had a few laughs, but frankly, it's just not all that great. It's killed by jokes that just aren't funny, and the fact that the original film is far better. And the kid that was supposed to be playing Jeff Daniels's character (I don't know his name, since I've never heard of him) was awful awful awful. That was the best guy they could get? However, the actor playing Jim Carrey's character was great, and he made the whole movie.

My mom also started babysitting this past Monday, and I didn't know the meaning of the word "tired" until now. It seems like this whole week has done nothing but sap every last bit of energy out of me. I'm never taking sleep for granted again.

That's all I've got for now, folks. Thank you for reading, and I shall see you later.