Sunday, September 26, 2004

Cheapest Ladders Ever

Once again, Sutton here.

So today was an action-packed day. My sis had a cookout to celebrate the big 1-8 (which was Wednesday), and much fun was had by all in attendance. Happy belated birthday, sis.

After the cookout, me and the usual suspects wen to Alton for some wrestling. Have any of you wrestling fans seen a TLC match end in a pinfall? I've seen one other ladder match end in a pinfall, but that was because the rules were like that already. This one ended in a pin because they didn't have any other way to end it. See, the two ladders they had were the kind where you could only climb one side safely, and the dummies in the ring decided to climb up both sides to do some spots. You know what that means? The flimsy side of the ladder eventually just snapped in half. So since they didn't have any more ladders, the ref at ringside got up in the ring and announced that pins and submissions would count too. The winner only got his title belt when the ref held up the broken side of one ladder so he could climb it. But other than that, it was a pretty good match, one of the better indy matches I've seen live (and the first ladder match I've seen live, too).

You know what really bites? I can't get my DSL to work on my computer. I got it to work on one, but not the other. Something about an expired IP or some such nonsense. Anybody who has any experience with BellSouth DSL is very welcome to give me advice, because I hate this. My DSL (or lack thereof) is making me angry, and it won't like me when I'm angry. Grrr, and such.

Whoa, they're making a Fight Club game. Did it take them long enough? Fight Club came out in 1999, why not make a Saving Private Ryan game while they're at it?

Don't really have much else to say, so I'll give you some quick horror movie news: George Romero's Land of the Dead has a few new cast members. Joining the cat are John Leguizamo, Simon Baker (from L.A. Confidential and Ring 2), and Edgar Wright and Simon Pegg (from Shaun of the Dead), as well as Robert Joy (from Amityville 3 and the recent made-for-TV remake of Helter Skelter) and Asia Argento (who appeared in XXX and is the daughter of Italian horror movie legend Dario Argento).

That's all I've got for now. Sutton out.

Thursday, September 16, 2004

Movie News For Your Daily Lives

This is Sutton, once again bringing the updatery goodness. A happy (belated) birthday goes out to Libby, and Hurricane Ivan can die of gonorrhea and rot in Hell. I'm sure my friends in Alabama will agree with me.

So other than that, there's not really a lot of going on. And when that happens, I have nothing better to do than hit the movie news.

Jessica Simpson will be playing Daisy Duke in the Warner Brothers movie adaptation of The Dukes of Hazzard, joining Johnny Knoxville and Seann William Scott in the cast. Word is that Jay Chandrakashar (director/star of Super Troopers and Club Dread) will direct the movie from a script by John O'Brien (who co-wrote the Starsky & Hutch movie) and Jonathan Davis.

According to the Hollywood Reporter, Karl Urban will be the lead in Universal's adaptation of the Doom video games. I've heard The Rock has been cast too, which would make him one busy man. He's also doing a movie version of the Spy Hunter video game and Be Cool (the sequel to Get Shorty).

Also on the topic of video games becoming movies, Paramount Pictures has tapped Dean Georgaris to write their adaptation of the Area 51 arcade game. Georgaris previously wrote Lara Croft, Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life, Paycheck, and Denzel Washington's remake of The Manchurian Candidate. I love Area 51, so I'll have to check this one out.

If you want to freak someone out in the middle of the night, turn out all the lights and fire up the Unsolved Mysteries theme song. It works for me.

I've been watching Dr. Phil's show a lot lately, and some of those guests could use Dr. Phil smacking them upside the head. They need somebody to tell them, "quit being stupid, stupid!" Maybe that's why I don't have a degree in psychology, a book deal, and my own TV show.

Bad news for fans of The Ramones: guitarist Johnny Ramone lost his battle with prostate cancer last night at the age of 55. A tribute concert was held this past Sunday to raise money for cancer research, and another concert is scheduled for October 8th at New York City's Spirit Club.

Not a lot else to talk about. Sutton out.

Saturday, September 11, 2004

Nemesis: Ugliest Monster Ever

Me and dad caught Resident Evil: Apocalypse this afternoon. I thought it was better than the first (my review of which you can read here), but it seemed like the plot was lacking a little. They introduced the Jill Valentine character, but I don't think they actually said what relevance she has to the Resident Evil universe. Sure, Resident Evil fans know who she is, but it's never really established for those who haven't played the games. But overall, I'll give it three and a half stars for its effort.

That's all I've got for today. Sutton out.

Wednesday, September 8, 2004

EC F'N W!

It's been a week or so since my last update (which wasn't that long to begin with), so here's an update for you.

It's been posted at various wrestling news sites and a Blog Nation hotspot, but I'm re-posting it here so I can have something to talk about. What I'm talking about is the reported special bonus features on WWE's upcoming "Rise And Fall of ECW" video. So here's the list thus far...

  • Tag champions Raven and Stevie Richards vs. The Pit Bulls in a best-of-three-falls dog collar match (September 16, 1995)
  • Rey Mysterio vs. Psicosis in a best-of-three-falls match (October 7, 1995)
  • World champion The Sandman vs. Mikey Whipwreck in a ladder match (October 28, 1995)
  • TV champion 2 Cold Scorpio vs. Sabu (February 17, 1996)
  • Raven vs. Tommy Dreamer (June 6, 1997)
  • TV champion Tazz vs. Bam Bam Bigelow (March 1, 1998)
  • TV champion Rob Van Dam vs. Jerry Lynn (May 16, 1999)

My feelings are kinda mixed on this one. I already have the dog collar match, Tazz/Bam Bam, and RVD/Lynn on the Pioneer DVDs, as well as the Rey/Psicosis match where they made their ECW debuts (which I contend is better than the best-of-three match). I really hope this is only a partial list or that documentary feature is really long, because that doesn't seem to be a lot. And I hope WWE spends the cash for "Natural Born Killaz" so they can do the obligatory "New Jack runs in and beats the everloving snot out of one or more people with various blunt objects" montage. If they can't do that, I hope they pay to keep "Enter Sandman" for The Sandman's super-long, beer-and-nicotine-fueled intro.

If there's one thing the ECW DVD needs, it's a montage of insane spots, bumps, and moments that ended up being more famous like the actual matches. Some examples I'll throw out: Rocco Rock of Public Enemy jumping off a cage through two tables, Brian Lee slamming Tommy Dreamer off a balcony and through four tables, the BWO entering, New Jack diving off a balcony, The Blue Meanie dancing, Chris Benoit breaking Sabu's neck, J.T. Smith slipping off the top rope and smacking his face on the ground (resulting in a giant lump on his forehead), RVD doing a flip off the top rope and into the fourth row, The Sandman hanging from a low nightclub ceiling and dropping onto Mikey, Perry Saturn dropping off a scaffold, Sandman caning somebody (maybe the Tommy Dreamer "thank you, may I have another" moment), and any flaming table spot.

And I do hope that they devote at least a little time to the Dreamer/Raven feud outside of that one match, because that feud is the reason I became an ECW fan. The first episode of ECW's syndicated TV show I ever saw featured Raven "breaking" two of Tommy's fingers. As an impressionable young mark way back in 1995, I'd only heard of ECW in a few issues of Pro Wrestling Illustrated. After seeing the Dreamer/Raven segment, I was blown away. All I'd known up to then were the sanitized, family-friendly WWF and WCW. But after seeing ECW, I was hooked. I didn't miss a single episode of the syndicated show for two years, and I actually have several VHS tapes full of the show scattered around somewhere. ECW was a cool blend of mindless violence, high-flying, and technical wrestling that made me love pro wrestling even more. I was a fan of wrestling before I discovered ECW, but ECW made me an even bigger fan. Even during the dark days of TNN and Paul Heyman's cold checks, I never gave up on the promotion that I loved. And three years after its death, I remain a fan of ECW.

You know, with WWE doing this ECW DVD, I wonder if they might do a similar "Rise And Fall of WCW" documentary. Even though their rise and fall lasted from the conception of the NWO to the last episode of Nitro, a DVD covering WCW from Ted Turner's purchase (with maybe some Jim Crockett stuff as a lead-in) all the way to 2001 would be cool. They could put War Games '92 and the Sting/Flair time limit draw on there for sure. I'd love that. And they could put the half-hour segment of the NWO redecorating the Nitro set just for laughs. The set would be "the rise and fall," which means they'd have to put less-than-stellar moments on there too.

Word is that cut WWE Diva Potential Amy Weber suffered a severe arm injury in her arm wrestling match on Raw Monday night. That sucks, but she should be happy that Christy didn't go all "Jeff Goldblum in The Fly" on her and snap her forearm in half.

I mentioned last week during my "Raw Thoughts" that I wanted to see a ladder match with Edge, Chris Jericho, and Christian, and WWE went and gave me two-thirds of it at the PPV on Sunday. Maybe I should have been more specific: I wanted to see it on Raw. I don't want to shell out 30 bucks for the PPV.

Y'know, if MTV is going to air reruns of Jackass, then I wish the'd show more than the same five episodes over and over. Then again, TVTome.com says that there were only 25 episodes of the show over an 18-month run, not counting the two specials they did when the movie was released. My real question is this: why do the two Jackass "best of" DVDs, when they could have just put together all 25 episodes (uncut with the original music, and no blurs or bleeps or replacement music like on the "best of" DVDs) into a five-disc box set. Slap together some special features (maybe cast interviews or segments that were "too hot for TV"), and there you go. I'm sure it'd make a little money. Money from people who like watching others act like morons is still money, darn it.

I have nothing left to say here. Maybe there'll be more to say in my next update. I want to go see Resident Evil: Apocalypse this weekend, so maybe that'll be something to talk about if I do. Anyway, that's all I've got. Sutton out.

Wednesday, September 1, 2004

The Whedonverse's Black Sheep

New review up: Buffy The Vampire Slayer. Check it out.