Same Hangover, Different Movie

A couple of years ago, Warner Bros. released their raunchy comedy The Hangover to box office success and critical acclaim. It deserved it too, because it was a great movie. So two years later, The Hangover: Part II has hit theaters. And I can tell you that it's just as crude, outrageous, and potentially offensive as its predecessor, if not more so. It's also absolutely hilarious.

The movie has absolutely no shame at all and is all the funnier for it. While it's true that it's practically the exact same movie as the original as far as the plot goes, only with the raunchiness turned up as high as it could possibly go. There's no other way to describe the movie. And I've gotta be honest, it was continually making me laugh my butt off. This kind of comedy isn't for everybody, and not every movie that tries it is successful. But The Hangover: Part II is one of the funniest comedies I've seen in a while. Practically every joke is uproarious, sometimes for the weirdest reasons, and it never lets up. So I'm going to give it four stars and a definite recommendation to check it out, especially if you enjoyed the original Hangover.

And now that the summer blockbuster season is fully underway, it feels like the movies are coming out right and left. Here's hoping that the majority of them don't suck.

Ahoy, Me Mateys

So not long writing after my previous post, my mom and I ventured out to see the newest chapter in the Pirates of the Caribbean film franchise.And at best, it's just okay. It's not a bad movie, but it's just more of the same. It's nothing fans of the series haven't seen before.

The problem with On Stranger Tides is that it's forgettable. I don't remember much of it at all. It's like they found the usual Pirates of the Caribbean formula, eliminated Keira Knightley and Orlando Bloom, replaced Bill Nighy's captivating Davy Jones with Ian McShane's boring Blackbeard, and threw it into theaters. And there's even some uninteresting, pointless romantic subplot with a Christian missionary and a mermaid to hammer home the fact that they're only making this movie for the money. (And on the topic of "doing it for the money," did it have to be in 3D? The movie could have worked just fine in 2D.)

It does have its moments, especially considering how good Johnny Depp's performance is. But On Stranger Tides isn't quite as good as it could have been. I'll still give it three stars though, and dismiss it. Maybe I'll appreciate it more when the DVD comes out, I don't know. But we'll have to wait and see.

Oh Yeah, Dig It!

It's been a few days, but the news that "Macho Man" Randy Savage passed away still doesn't feel real. It feels like some kind of weird joke somebody's trying to pull. Whether it be his famous matches with Hulk Hogan and Ricky "The Dragon" Steamboat during the height of the WWF's popularity in the '80s, or his ubiquitous "snap into a Slim Jim!" commercials in the '90s, or his appearance as Bonesaw McGraw in the first Spider-Man movie, Savage was a guy who provided a ton of memorable moments over the last three decades. He was consistently entertaining no matter what he was doing, and not only as a pro wrestling fan but as a fan of things that are awesome, I can definitely say that "Macho Man" Randy Savage will be sorely missed.

It's A Ring Thing

Wow, I really need to wipe the dust off this thing. It's been sitting here unused for forever. Seriously, only one post during the whole month of April? What's wrong with me? I thought I was better than that. But no, I had to go and pay more attention to the S@TM blog instead. Because it's apparently replaced the MSX as my favorite blog to write on. So yeah, a big "Fail" in my part. Shame on me.

(But really, you should be checking the S@TM blog. I update that thing a lot more than I do this one, so at least you could be reading something of mine somewhere.)

Anyway, I think I've finally found something to post about here. I was in a chat room a couple of weeks ago, talking about the upcoming Green Lantern movie. The topic then diverted to the topic of which characters from Marvel Comics — the rivals of Green Lantern's DC — would get rings representing the various Lantern Corps from Green Lantern's mythology. That's too good a topic not to talk about.

Let's go in the order of the colors of the rainbows and start with the Red Lantern Corps, who represent rage and extreme anger. I would probably go with the Incredible Hulk, since he seems like he'd be the most obvious. I mean, "you wouldn't like me when I'm angry" is practically the catchphrase of his alter ego Bruce Banner. So I could totally see the Hulk as a Red Lantern if he got far enough out of control.

Let's move on to the Orange Lanterns, who wield the light of avarice. The first character that comes to mind is Norman Osborne, especially in the wake of the "Secret Invasion" and "Siege" story arcs. That thirst for ultimate power he's shown would make him a perfect candidate for an orange ring. As far as other Orange Lanterns go, I'd probably have to choose Justin Hammer and Obadiah Stane. I doubt all three of them could function together as a corps if given orange power rings, because if the Larfleeze/Lex Luthor scenes in "Blackest Night" were any indication, they'd probably turn on one another in an effort for each of them to individually wield the orange light.

Continuing onward to the Sinestro Corps, whose rings channel the yellow light of fear, I can think of multiple characters who could fit perfectly. The first one that immediately comes to mind is Frank Castle, the Punisher. The guy is pretty much a serial killer, and I'd hate to be in a dark alley with him if I were a criminal. Depending on the writer and the story arc, the Punisher can be one scary dude. But he'd probably be discharged from the Sinestro Corps for insubordination, since I would expect him to start killing other members of the Sinestro Corps as soon as he realized they weren't the good guys. And considering how much hatred he has for criminals, I wouldn't be surprised if the Punisher qualified for a Red Lantern Ring too.

As far as other potential Marvel Sinestro Corpsmen go, the Daredevil villain Mr. Fear is probably the most obvious. He has "Fear" in his name, for crying out loud. But what about other, less obvious characters. I'd definitely give a yellow ring to Galactus, solely for the fact that the guy eats planets. If a giant alien in a purple gladiator helmet was going to eat Earth, I'd probably pee myself in fear. As far as other yellow rings go, Man-Thing would get special consideration (since "whatever knows fear burns at Man-Thing's touch"), as would the Norman Osborne from Marvel's Ultimate Universe. Even the Hulk could probably qualify for a yellow ring.

But we're going to need to move along, or else I could come up with a few more potential Sinestro Corpsmen. So let's venture onward to the next color, the Green Lantern Corps. Green Lantern rings are fueled by willpower, and there are tons of Marvel characters who have a ton of it. But two characters in particular stand out. One of them is Doctor Doom. Yes, the Doctor Doom who's been a thorn in the side of the Fantastic Four since Stan Lee and Jack Kirby created him. He has one of the strongest wills in comics, able to ward off mind control and even briefly stop himself from becoming a zombie (as seen in the Marvel Zombies vs. Army of Darkness comic) through sheer willpower alone. However, I wouldn't expect him to stay a member of the Green Lantern Corps for long were he to become a member. He'd probably be rejected by the Corps fairly quickly since his arrogance won't make him much of a team player. But I'd be willing to bet that Doctor Doom is smart enough to find a way to get a green power ring one way or another.

The other character, one who would be absolutely perfect for the Green Lantern Corps, is Steve Rogers. The first and the most famous Captain America would make a fantastic Green Lantern. He never gives up, never surrenders, never says die. He'll fight until he can't anymore, and then he'll still keep fighting anyway. He'll only yield when continuing the fight would do more harm than good. Should the tides of the comic book industry ever shift drastically enough that DC and Marvel became one, Steve Rogers had better get a Green Lantern ring because he'd be a great choice for it.

Next on the list would be the Blue Lantern Corps, who run on hope. For the Blue Lantern Corps, I'd probably go with Charles Xavier of the X-Men. He's always been the inspirational type, considering he's essentially to mutants what Martin Luther King was to African Americans during the civil rights movement. If any Marvel character is can bring a hope for a better tomorrow to others, it'd probably be Professor X.

And then then there's the Indigo Tribe, a corps who tap into compassion. Believe it or not, it was hard at first for me to find the right person (or persons) to fill this spot. But then after flipping through some of my comic collection, I stumbled upon who I thought would fit: Pepper Potts. Specifically, Pepper Potts as she's been written lately by Matt Fraction. If you haven't been reading the comics, Pepper has acquired her own version of the Iron Man armor, built solely for rescue and recovery. She's taken on the superheroine name "Rescue," dedicated to rescuing and helping people that need it. And maybe it's just me, but I think maybe that could be worthy of earning Pepper an indigo ring.

This brings us to the Star Sapphires, the violet corps whose rings run on love. And I can't say I'm really sure who among the Marvel characters this ring would belong to. After some deliberation, the first name I could think of was Mary Jane Watson. I didn't start reading Spider-Man comics until after the "One More Day" story ended her marriage to Spidey, so I can't say I know an awful lot about that version of Mary Jane. Most of my experience with the character come from the Ultimate Spider-Man comics and Kirsten Dunst's portrayal of her in Sam Raimi's movies. But as far as those go, I can definitely see that Mary Jane has a lot of love in her heart for both Peter Parker and for life itself, and if I were handing out power rings, I'd hand her the Star Sapphire ring.

And there are only two colors left, the black rings of death and the white rings of life. I'd be too hard-pressed to name members of a White Lantern Corps, so I'm not going to even try. White power rings don't follow the same rules as the other ones, anyway. But the Black Lantern Rings, those will be easy. As far as a Black Lantern Corps goes, I'd give rings to every character whose death played an important part in another character's development. So we'd see characters like the Punisher's wife and children, Ben Parker, Gwen Stacy, Happy Hogan, and Daredevil's father resurrected as Black Lanterns. Maybe they could even turn the Marvel Zombies into Black Lanterns. That'd make for one hell of a story.

Now please keep in mind that this is all just one guy's thoughts and opinions on things that'll never happen in a million years. And really, if you're a comic book geek, this could be a good conversation starter. So if you've got any thoughts on this whole "Marvel Lantern Corps" dealie I've been yammering on about, feel free to share them. I'd love to hear 'em.

And is it wrong for me to hope for another Marvel/DC Comics crossover where the Marvel Universe gets a heaping helping of power rings? I want to see how the actual companies would handle that.