Rotiart: Dumbest Disguise Ever
I was going through some of my older posts the other day, and I wasn't exactly thrilled with my recap of the first episode of Who Wants To Be A Superhero? I was a little harsh regarding the episode, and besides, I only covered the second half of it. So via the magic of the Internet (and my favorite peer-to-peer downloading program), we're going back in time to review the premiere episode of my favorite new reality show.
We open with our friendly neighborhood announcer explaining the show's concept: comic book legend Stan Lee is searching for "the next great superhero." After an extensive casting call featuring would-be contestants pitching a character of their own invention, the twelve contestants selected will be tested on their superhero mettle. And the ultimate prize: immortality. The winner receives a comic book written by Stan The Man and published by Dark Horse Comics, along with their own "Sci-Fi Channel Original" movie.
After clips of the auditions, we are introduced to the contestants:
I just have to quote Stan, because this is too good:
Anyway, Stan pops up to announce that the heroes will be moving out of their current location and into a secret lair. He tells them he's arranged for them to travel in something "very inconspicuous," but he and I must have a different definition of that word, because he has them picked up by one of those stretch Hummer limousines. Oh, that's totally inconspicuous. Nobody would ever notice a bunch of people in spandex outfits wheeling around in a tank.
The twelve heroes are immediately taken aback by their new lair, because on the outside, it looks like a run-down warehouse in the middle of the ghetto. They're not even sure if it's the right place until they open up the front door and see Stan's grinning mug on a monitor. He confirmed that this was their destination after all, but announced that one of them would not be allowed inside. That piece of news also came with the revelation that one of the contestants is one of Stan's assistants, a spy enlisted to weed out the least worthy superhero.
Each of them made accusations, before Rotiart proclaimed that his name is "traitor" spelled backwards. Well, gee, isn't that convenient. It does make sense that he'd be the spy, since he didn't seem all that interested in interacting with the others. It didn't help that he wasn't in the opening credits, either. Rotiart informed the others that he'd been taping the others with a hidden camera (as opposed to the other cameras sitting out in the open filming them?), and found three contestants whose intentions he'd found to be a little suspect.
First up was Levity, who builds customized action figures and thinks one of himself could make boatloads of money if he wins. Secondly was Creature, who was being way too flirty with a number of the male heroes, which Stan thought made her look like she was just there to hook up. And thirdly was Iron Enforcer, who had no problem boasting about how deadly he was. All three were put up on the chopping block, but Stan decided that it was Levity who would be the first to turn in his costume. Rotiart escorted him away, and Stan allowed the remaining ten into the lair.
The place doesn't look like much when they enter, and the freight elevator they have to take looks like it'd crash at any minute, but their lair isn't as bad as the exterior. It's actually pretty ritzy, believe it or not. Stan called them into the dining room and informed them that since he could not test their powers, he would test them on their values. He gave each of them a communicator so he could speak to them personally, and told them that the day ahead would be a big one.
The reason it was such a big day is because it marked their first challenge. One at a time, the superheroes were to change from their civilian clothes into their superhero costumes in an inconspicuous location, then race across a town plaza to a designated checkpoint. They originally believed it was a test of speed, but there was a catch. There's always a catch. As the heroes ran through the plaza, they'd have to run past a lost little girl crying for her mother. Unbeknownst to the heroes, she was their real objective. Those who stopped to check on her passed, while those who didn't failed.
Of the ten heroes, only four (Fat Momma, Cell Phone Girl, Lemuria, and Major Victory) stopped to check on the girl. What kind of hero ignores a crying child? I'd buy Iron Enforcer ignoring her, because he looks like the kind of superhero that would be way too focused on kicking the everloving snot out of a supervillain. That poor crying child would probably be caught up in the crossfire and collateral damage and whatnot. And I will have to give Monkey Woman style points, for staying in character by climbing a tree in order to change her costume.
Stan dropped the bombshell about the little girl after each had finished, then called them all back to the lair, where they would meet on the roof at their normal chopping block. This time around, he first called up Nitro G, citing his failure to change into his costume conspicuously, as he instead opted to do it out where he could be easily seen. He even called Nitro G down for grinning with embarrassment ("Stop smiling! This is very serious."). Second up was Monkey Woman, who Stan thought actually saw the little girl but kept running anyway. And lastly was Iron Enforcer, whose violent tendencies still didn't sit well with Stan.
Each of them was given an opportunity to explain why they shouldn't be cut. Each of them explained that they simply didn't pay any attention to her, and all three asked for a second chance. But somebody has to go, and that somebody is Nitro G. Stan asked him to turn in his costume, and wished the remaining nine the best of luck. Roll credits.
Thus endeth the debut episode of Who Wants To Be A Superhero?. Personally, I thought the show drastically improved after this episode, because this one seemed like they were still working out all the kinks. It also helped that we really started getting to know the contestants in the second episode, since we really didn't know any of them. Especially Levity, considering he only lasted halfway into the episode.
I'll admit that I wasn't 100% sold upon seeing this episode the first time. But as I tuned in the next week and the week after that, it really began to grow on me. It helped that I thought the contestants were quite entertaining too, which is an important part of any show.
And now it's back to waiting for Season Two. If there is one, I'll see you back here then. Until then, true believers, excelsior.
We open with our friendly neighborhood announcer explaining the show's concept: comic book legend Stan Lee is searching for "the next great superhero." After an extensive casting call featuring would-be contestants pitching a character of their own invention, the twelve contestants selected will be tested on their superhero mettle. And the ultimate prize: immortality. The winner receives a comic book written by Stan The Man and published by Dark Horse Comics, along with their own "Sci-Fi Channel Original" movie.
After clips of the auditions, we are introduced to the contestants:
- Tobias Trost - "Levity"
- Jonathan Finestone - "Rotiart"
- Tonya Kay - "Creature"
- Chris Watters - "Major Victory"
- Steel Chambers - "The Iron Enforcer"
- Mary Votava - "Monkey Woman"
- Nell Wilson - "Fat Momma"
- Darren Passarello - "Nitro G"
- Chelsea Weld - "Cell Phone Girl"
- Matthew Atherton - "Feedback"
- E. Quincy Sloan - "Ty'veculus"
- Tonatzin Mondragon - "Lemuria"
I just have to quote Stan, because this is too good:
You tell 'em, Stan!"Hold it there! This is serious business! Don't you realize what you're there for? We're looking for the next superhero! I spent my life creating superheroes, and they don't act like that!"
Anyway, Stan pops up to announce that the heroes will be moving out of their current location and into a secret lair. He tells them he's arranged for them to travel in something "very inconspicuous," but he and I must have a different definition of that word, because he has them picked up by one of those stretch Hummer limousines. Oh, that's totally inconspicuous. Nobody would ever notice a bunch of people in spandex outfits wheeling around in a tank.
The twelve heroes are immediately taken aback by their new lair, because on the outside, it looks like a run-down warehouse in the middle of the ghetto. They're not even sure if it's the right place until they open up the front door and see Stan's grinning mug on a monitor. He confirmed that this was their destination after all, but announced that one of them would not be allowed inside. That piece of news also came with the revelation that one of the contestants is one of Stan's assistants, a spy enlisted to weed out the least worthy superhero.
Each of them made accusations, before Rotiart proclaimed that his name is "traitor" spelled backwards. Well, gee, isn't that convenient. It does make sense that he'd be the spy, since he didn't seem all that interested in interacting with the others. It didn't help that he wasn't in the opening credits, either. Rotiart informed the others that he'd been taping the others with a hidden camera (as opposed to the other cameras sitting out in the open filming them?), and found three contestants whose intentions he'd found to be a little suspect.
First up was Levity, who builds customized action figures and thinks one of himself could make boatloads of money if he wins. Secondly was Creature, who was being way too flirty with a number of the male heroes, which Stan thought made her look like she was just there to hook up. And thirdly was Iron Enforcer, who had no problem boasting about how deadly he was. All three were put up on the chopping block, but Stan decided that it was Levity who would be the first to turn in his costume. Rotiart escorted him away, and Stan allowed the remaining ten into the lair.
The place doesn't look like much when they enter, and the freight elevator they have to take looks like it'd crash at any minute, but their lair isn't as bad as the exterior. It's actually pretty ritzy, believe it or not. Stan called them into the dining room and informed them that since he could not test their powers, he would test them on their values. He gave each of them a communicator so he could speak to them personally, and told them that the day ahead would be a big one.
The reason it was such a big day is because it marked their first challenge. One at a time, the superheroes were to change from their civilian clothes into their superhero costumes in an inconspicuous location, then race across a town plaza to a designated checkpoint. They originally believed it was a test of speed, but there was a catch. There's always a catch. As the heroes ran through the plaza, they'd have to run past a lost little girl crying for her mother. Unbeknownst to the heroes, she was their real objective. Those who stopped to check on her passed, while those who didn't failed.
Of the ten heroes, only four (Fat Momma, Cell Phone Girl, Lemuria, and Major Victory) stopped to check on the girl. What kind of hero ignores a crying child? I'd buy Iron Enforcer ignoring her, because he looks like the kind of superhero that would be way too focused on kicking the everloving snot out of a supervillain. That poor crying child would probably be caught up in the crossfire and collateral damage and whatnot. And I will have to give Monkey Woman style points, for staying in character by climbing a tree in order to change her costume.
Stan dropped the bombshell about the little girl after each had finished, then called them all back to the lair, where they would meet on the roof at their normal chopping block. This time around, he first called up Nitro G, citing his failure to change into his costume conspicuously, as he instead opted to do it out where he could be easily seen. He even called Nitro G down for grinning with embarrassment ("Stop smiling! This is very serious."). Second up was Monkey Woman, who Stan thought actually saw the little girl but kept running anyway. And lastly was Iron Enforcer, whose violent tendencies still didn't sit well with Stan.
Each of them was given an opportunity to explain why they shouldn't be cut. Each of them explained that they simply didn't pay any attention to her, and all three asked for a second chance. But somebody has to go, and that somebody is Nitro G. Stan asked him to turn in his costume, and wished the remaining nine the best of luck. Roll credits.
Thus endeth the debut episode of Who Wants To Be A Superhero?. Personally, I thought the show drastically improved after this episode, because this one seemed like they were still working out all the kinks. It also helped that we really started getting to know the contestants in the second episode, since we really didn't know any of them. Especially Levity, considering he only lasted halfway into the episode.
I'll admit that I wasn't 100% sold upon seeing this episode the first time. But as I tuned in the next week and the week after that, it really began to grow on me. It helped that I thought the contestants were quite entertaining too, which is an important part of any show.
And now it's back to waiting for Season Two. If there is one, I'll see you back here then. Until then, true believers, excelsior.
posted by Matt Sutton at
5:02 PM
1 Comments:
Awesome post on this subject, as usual.
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