Werewolf/Vampire Hybrids At The Movies

Another weekend, another trip to the cineplex. I caught the 10:00 showing of Underworld: Evolution tonight, and considering I haven't seen the original Underworld yet, I didn't really understand the majority of the plot. There were a heavy amount of references to the events of the first movie, so if you go into the sequel without seeing it, you're probably going to be as confused as I was. From what I could discern, the heroine (as portrayed by the ever-lovely Kate Beckinsale) has teamed up with a heroic half-vampire/half-werewolf hybrid to stop a powerful vampiric villain from using his equally powerful werewolf brother to create an army of evil werevamp hybrids. Or something like that, I don't know for sure.

In any event, since I had no clue what was going on with the plot, I spent most of my time enjoying the action. And oh boy, is there action. Broken necks, jaws (and heads) ripped off, a brawl in the back of a moving truck, monsters getting thrown into whirring helicopter blades, and lots and lots of gunfire. And because I enjoyed myself watching it, I'll give Underworld: Evolution three and a half stars. I might promote it to four once I see the first Underworld, but that's the rating I'm going with now.

I was also quite intrigued by the trailers in front of Underworld: Evolution. The trailer for the remake of When A Stranger Calls makes no sense to me, because they give away the big twist right there in the trailer. Does that make any sense to anybody else? And then there was the trailer for Silent Hill, the cinematic adaptation of the video game. I haven't played any of the games, but the movie looks absolutely terrifying, so I'll definitely be in line to see it. After that, there was the trailer for X-Men 3, and I'm looking forward to that one as well. Sure, there might be 3000 people in the cast, but if War & Peace can manage, so can X-Men 3. And wrapping up the trailers was one for a new movie starring Milla Jovovich, titled Ultraviolet. Oh man, Ultraviolet looks like a big sweaty pile of monkey poop. It just doesn't look good at all.

Speaking of big sweaty piles of monkey poop, I'm currently watching King Kong Lives (the sequel to the 1976 remake) on television. I've seen better "man in a suit" effects in even the worst Godzilla movies. You'd figure that by 1986, they could have made some advancements in makeup design. I mean, if George Lucas can make Chewbacca look believable, then some genius could have slapped together a better King Kong outfit. The movie is so horrible, it's almost offensive. I want to punch this movie in its face.

And that's the end of this story. Sutton out.