Goodbye

Ninety percent of the time, when it comes to this blog, I keep my personal life personal. I'm a shy person by nature, so it's hard for me to really open up. But I'm gonna open up a little bit, for a change.

My grandmother Laura was born on December 3, 1912. The proud mother of four kids (my aunt, my two uncles, and my dad), she was like a second mother to me, helping raise me and my sister while our mom worked nights. My grandma's a very special person, not just to the family, but to almost everyone who knew her. She was the family's matriarch, our den mother, the biggest root on our family tree.

And here comes the bad news. A little over two hours ago, we said goodbye to her. I can't say I didn't see it coming, because she'd been sick for a while, but it's still killing me inside. I lost one of my best friends today, and I don't know how to handle it. I thought that if I just went without acknowledging it, I'd be okay. Out of sight, out of mind. But when I actually faced it, I just broke down inside. I'm not strong enough to cope with this. I've got to be, but I'm not, and I'm afraid. Part of me actually thought my grandmother would be around forever, and the realization that she's gone... it hurts. A lot.

I really don't know what else there is for me to say. I'm not good at this "opening up" thing. Feel free to send prayers or good vibes towards central Kentucky, because we could use them.